The Danger of Making People Your Source

*The temptation to turn a helper into a savior.*

One thing I have come to realize is that when people help us in significant ways, we naturally feel indebted to them. And to be fair, there is nothing wrong with gratitude. In fact, gratitude is a beautiful thing.

The problem starts when gratitude slowly transforms into dependence. That’s when we miss the point.

ANGELS ON ASSIGNMENT

As we journey through life, God brings different kinds of people into our lives. Some are there to encourage us. Some are there to help us. Some are there to teach us lessons. And some are honestly there to test us. Yes, test us. 😄

The next time someone pushes your buttons, before you react, ask yourself: “If I slap this person right now, have I passed or failed this test?” Hehehehe.

Okay, let me be serious.

There are certain situations in life where, if God had not used specific people to help us, we may have ended up in prison, in poverty, or in a very bad place. Let’s tell the truth. Some of us can look back and identify certain people and say: “There is no way this person entered my life by accident.”

The timing was too perfect, the help was too precise, and the intervention was too significant. Sometimes help comes in ways that make you sit down and wonder whether God personally sent someone your way.

And honestly, I believe He does. I believe some people are God’s hands and feet on earth. For a moment in your life, they become angels on assignment.

Now before somebody misquotes me, let me clarify. 😄 I am not saying these people are perfect. Some of them may be difficult people. Some may be grumpy. Some may not even like everybody. But if God used them to lift you out of a hole, then in that moment they were part of God’s plan for your life.

WHEN GRATITUDE BECOMES DEPENDENCE

The problem is what happens next. Instead of thanking God for using them, we start focusing entirely on them. Without realizing it, we move our dependence from God to the helper.

Let’s talk about these famous “destiny helpers.” The moment someone helps us significantly, we begin looking to them for everything. One favor becomes an expectation. One act of kindness becomes a lifelong responsibility. One answered request becomes our entire strategy for survival.

Imagine this scenario. Your parents are unable to pay your university fees. An uncle generously steps in. He sponsors your education from first year to third year. You are grateful. Everything is going well. Then suddenly, in your final year, the support stops.

What happens? For some people, it feels as though life has ended. Their entire hope was tied to that one person.

My dear, don’t make people your source. Not your father. Not your mother. Not your spouse. Not your children. Not your boss. Not even your “destiny helper.” Why? Because they are humans. And human beings are limited.

FIVE DANGERS OF MAKING PEOPLE YOUR SOURCE

**1. You will never be truly fulfilled.** The person you are depending on is probably still trying to figure out their own life. How can someone who is still searching for fulfillment become your source of fulfillment? Only God can carry that weight.

**2. You may become bitter.** When your expectations of people become unrealistic, disappointment is inevitable. And repeated disappointment can make you lose faith in people altogether.

**3. You place your destiny in human hands.** Think about it. What happens if that person relocates? Loses their job? Falls sick? Or, God forbid, dies? Life happens. That is why your future should never be built on one person’s ability to help you.

**4. You become vulnerable to manipulation.** Some people are kind. Others are not. When someone becomes your source, you may find yourself agreeing to things you normally would never do simply because you’re afraid of losing their support. And the painful part? The help may still never come.

**5. You become blind to other opportunities.** This one is huge. You become so fixated on one source of help that you miss all the other doors God is opening. You keep staring at one person while God is sending help from another direction.

WHAT WE FORGET ABOUT HELPERS

Here’s something we often forget: whenever someone helps you, it is because God put it on their heart to do so. Human beings are naturally occupied with their own lives and responsibilities. You are not the only person with needs. The fact that someone chose to help you is already a blessing.

Another thing we forget is that life happens to helpers too. Yes. Destiny helpers need help sometimes. 😄 They get tired. They experience financial challenges. They go through emotional struggles. They have family problems. They carry burdens you know nothing about.

So just because your helper hasn’t told you what they’re going through doesn’t mean they’re fine.

And let me say something that may sting a little: it’s their money. It’s their time. It’s their effort. Whether God instructed them to help you or not, they still have a choice.

Before getting upset because someone refused your request, ask yourself: “Was it mine in the first place?”

Hmm. Food for thought.

PEOPLE ARE CHANNELS. GOD IS THE SOURCE.

So what should we do? Simple. Trust God, not people. People can be channels. God is the source. There is a difference.

Jeremiah 17:5 warns against placing our trust in man. Not because people are evil. But because people are limited.

Let’s be practical. You may have identified your wealthy uncle as your source of financial breakthrough. You may have identified your influential aunt as Plan B. Meanwhile, God has over eight billion people He can use. Eight billion! Your help doesn’t have to come through Uncle Kwame. 😄

God can raise help from places you never imagined. Someone can travel from Guatemala to Ghana just to open a door for you. Why? Because God has swag like that. 😄

HIS PLAN IS TO EMPOWER YOU

One thing I love about God is this: His ultimate plan is not for us to remain dependent. His plan is to empower us. To give us ideas. To open doors. To create opportunities. To establish us so firmly that one day we become a blessing to others.

Many times, our impatience is the real problem. Not because we are starving. Not because we will die. But because we are comparing ourselves to our friends.

Your friend enters university this year. You enter next year. You’re still alive.

Your friend can afford the three-bedroom apartment. You can afford a single room. You’ll still sleep. 😄

You see, in this life eeh... put all your eggs in God’s basket. Why? Because He doesn’t just own a basket. He owns the poultry farm. And if the eggs break, He can give you an entirely new farm. 😄

So when someone says they cannot help you, don’t become bitter. Maybe they genuinely can’t. And even if they can, they are not obligated to.

Be grateful for the help you’ve received. Appreciate people. Honor people. But never make people your source.

Because people are channels. God is the Source. And channels may change. But the Source never runs dry.

When God uses people to bless you, thank Him for the people. But keep your eyes on Him.

Because the moment you mistake the channel for the source, disappointment is usually waiting around the corner. 💭

**Have you ever mistaken a “destiny helper” for your actual source? What helped you course-correct? Tell me in the comments. 👇**